I realized recently that I have become a bit of an enabler and a needy gal. I hate that. I think my longing for a real relationship caused me to become content with bad behavior and disrespect. It has clouded my vision of common sense. Also, the fact that I am very forgiving is another aspect of this.
I deserve kindness, positive attention and an all around nice dude. I deserve someone who will call, email, etc and not leave me in the lurch wondering, does he like me?? Oh my god!
I do not deserve drunk dials at 2am from someone I barely know or to be made fun of and laughed at when I reveal intimate details of my life to a person I think is nice and I did want to get to know.
I feel as if I sound a bit caustic about this whole thing but I am sick of having the same experiences.
I thought I met a few nice guys once but one didn't work out and broke my heart a bit (a bit..means a great deal..but yeah..not going there doesn't help the emotions) and the other just still leaves me wondering. I miss one as a friend a lot (that would be second dude). He was just nice to be around.
Like a total romantic, I still have a wee bit of hope for both of these situations...why? I HAVE NO IDEA!! I think they are the only ones I felt a connection and commonality with. Will I find it again? I have no idea. The funny thing is, I could be completely full of crap when I say that they felt something, most likely they didn't. I don't even know. Honestly, I don't know nothin, about nothin.