So, a few months ago I thought it would be a fun idea to have a graduation party but now I am rethinking the whole deal. I will still have it but..honestly, I really don't want to do it. Why? Well, I have few people to invite outside of grad school friends. I am close to very few people who knew me prior to grad school. Does that make me sad? Yes, a little bit.
As I transition into life after grad school, I will no longer be able to identify myself as the grad school Nicole. I will slowly return to the pre and post grad school Nicole. I'd like to have people in my life who knew me before but at this point, I really do not see that happening. We all grow and see our priorities change, others do not or grow in a different direction.
I know I have some very good friends who know me now and one who knew me then. But, the others, I am a bit sad about. Maybe, we don't want to know each other now or maybe they just want to know themselves.
I am stepping out into this world alone, like I have been this entire year. It's been very hard and not a hell of a lot of fun. I have few people to turn to, hopefully, they will be there if I need them.
2 comments:
Although we do not see each other as often as I would like, there are things that happen that make me think about you at least once a week...weird things...like baby carrots...tea...polka dots... I do not have many people that knew me pre-war, but you were there through it all with your e-mails and packages! We will be the little old ladies drinking tea both wearing red hats someday....
Of course we will....and yes I was referring to you as the person who still knows me from before. <3 miss you my love...
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