Anyway, at 33 years of age, I am not quite at the station in life that I desire. This year I went from believing I was going to spend the rest of my life with someone to realizing that was not going to happen and I was once again alone. It's a lonely life. The loneliness is tangible and not many people understand how difficult consistently being alone can be. I have friends but none are close by. I participate in a extracurricular activities and solo activities to keep myself "busy" but I am alone most of the time.
I've made changes to live a happier, healthier and more positive life. I have a more positive outlook than I did before but I am not completely healed. I wonder when I will feel whole again.
Along with an earth shattering break-up, I also experienced a freak illness. Granted it did not require hospitalization but I did go through a lot of tests and doctor visits. It came to light that I have food allergies. They are random and inhibit my consumption of some of my favorite foods. I am still getting the hang of modifying my eating habits but like everything else, I am working on it. I can't say it's been easy. I feel better, thank goodness.
With all the ups and the many downs of 2014, I want 2015 to be filled with light, happiness, adventures and most of all love and healing.
I will make some proclamations about the coming year.
- I will bake more and write about it. I've baked so much over the past few months and I have not chronicled it.
- I will own a dog. It will be the cutest, sweetest, bestest pup in all the land.
- I will own a home. It will be the cutest, prettiest home in all the land.
- I will write more. I actually wrote last year...remember..I wrote cool poems. :)
- I will have more happy.
Goodbye 2014...you've taught me a great deal.